Forum Discussion

You might be a Left winger if... (February 16, 2006 1:23 PM)
Posted by: Patricia Gruffs
...you are a feminist who believes wearing a burqua is a form of sisterhood solidarity against Bush's systemic effort to take away women's human rights in Afghanistan and Iraq

...if you are outraged over NSA wiretapping calls from overseas into the US, but never gave a thought to "increased terrorist chatter" as explanation to a heightened threat level (Also believes 2+2 doesn't equal 4).

...if your still looking for that Halliburton clause in the Iraqi Constitution.

...facts just don't matter.

...You think that patchouli smells good.

...If you think that the guy at cropcircleboardgames.co.uk sells real Princess Diana stuff.

...you think the word "abortion" really is in the Constitution somewhere.

...You might be a leftard if the signs you hold read "Support Our Troops. Bring Them Home" on one side and "Impeach Bush" on the other.

...You protest the war outside of Walter Reed Army Medical Center while soldiers who protect your freedom lay wounded and recovering inside.

...You're a Congresswoman from Houston.

...You think the 9/11 Commission still does anything meaningful.

...You believe that soy stops bullets better than Kevlar.

...Your husband divorces you because you honor your son's sacrifice by becoming a posterchild for wackos.

...You think illegal aliens pay taxes.

...You fail to recognize that President would have budgeted more money for college financial aid if he didn't have to allocate more resources toward stopping illegal aliens swarming over the border.

...You think that the INS was an effective federal agency.

...You really believe that every alien who illegally enters the U.S. qualifies for Temporary Protected Status.

...You believe that Muslims are tolerant, but Christians are not.

...You think it's okay to store AK-47s in mosques, but not in homes.

...You hire illegal aliens to clean your house, watch your kids and cut your grass so you can have more time to protest military recruiters at the local high school (For all the leftards in Montgomery County, Maryland. Props to Michael Graham).

...You believe illegal aliens should be issued drivers licenses despite not being able to read the English printed on them.

...You "work" for PBS.

...You think church youth groups, the Minutemen, and the Guardian Angels are racist hate groups, but "La Raza" (The Race) and the Nation of Islam aren't.

...You think there's more to Al Sharpton than just great hair.

...You think Reginald Denny deserved it and Rodney King didn't.

...You think voting information should be printed in multiple languages.

...You believe showing identification at the polls smacks of "Big Brother" despite the fact that seven percent of those who vote aren't even U.S. citizens!!!

...Your mantra is "Run, Jesse, run!"

...you think that killing babies in an abortion clinic is good, but killing a multiple murderer on death row is bad.

...you think making leftist political speeches at a funeral held INSIDE A CHURCH is OK, but a conservative doing the same thing calls for swift action by the IRS

...you think the IRS are the good guys

...you're rooting AGAINST Jack Bauer

...you think "Will and Grace" represents the mainstream of America

...you think the "mainstream" media represent the mainstream of America

...you think Teddy K would make a great drivers-ed teacher

...your fingers don’t dig halfway through your armrests when Nancy Pelosi stands up to speak

...You still think the Clinton impeachment was about sex.

...you think George W. Bush is dumber than a box of rocks, but smart enough to lead an international conspiracy involving oil companies, defense contractors, and the Saudi Royal Family.

...you always say 'the Bush administration's illegal war'

...You believe that all illegal aliens aren’t criminals

...You believe the U.S. is the biggest violator of human rights in the world

...You think taxes are the solution for deficits

...You think marriage is a right

...You also think medical insurance is a right

...And getting a drivers license

...And having wireless internet access

...You believe global warming will kill us all

...You believe that global warming is causing global cooling

...You believe socialism can work

...you think giving full protection under the Constitution to the idiots at Gitmo is "what any humane civilization would do".

... if you think the way to deal with a bully is to give him your lunch money

... if you think it's O.K. to give an abortion to a minor even though they can't get any other medical procedure done without the permission of their parents and insurance companies

... you think the founding fathers said anything about "the separation of Church and State"

... if after every Republican victory you threaten to leave the county, but never do

... if you go to other countries and bash the president and government, enrage your fan base and sink into obscurity

There are so many, many more! goto www.imao.us!!!


You might be a Left winger if... (February 16, 2006 1:32 PM)
Posted by: Crazy Pete
OH MY GOD!! Patricia, I love you, you are my new hero, I'm going to copy these and use them! That is great!!

*Looks to Good Will for the opening of the big mouth* We all know its comming
You might be a Left winger if... (February 16, 2006 10:13 PM)
Posted by: Steven McAllister
Ah, stereotyping. Why discuss, think, and discuss some more when you can pick up the most hurtful, cliche, and largely inaccurate mud you can and throw it? I suppose liberals eat babies and have carnal relations with satan as well? You don't have any interest in a country united for the common good of all, do you? You'd just LOVE to see your way of life enforced on everyone, and are shocked and offended when someone stands up and disagrees with you. They must be insane and unpatriotic, right? I mean, they don't agree with YOU, and clearly you know everything.
You might be a Left winger if... (February 16, 2006 11:35 PM)
Posted by: Good Will
Ms. Patricia.
I welcome the member of the Villification Party to the debate.

Do not know facts? Can not argue on merits? have nothing to say back but quoting talking point that never actually happen? NO PROBLEM!!!!
Here are the lesson in VILLIFICATION of your opponent.

Example Topic:
Car accidents kill more people then terrorists.

First of all, ignore facts and try to switch the topic of the conversation by bringing up something overblown and villified.

Example; Well we all need cars to drive. And more over not all of us drive a car like that liberal Ted Kennedy.

Lesson Two:
Stay off topic and do not say any similar issues your side is having.

Example: You libs are all the same, you hate America. And you can not drive, as Ted Kennedy showed. And I DO NOT CARE that Laura Bush run over and killed her boyfriend with a car. Its all about Ted Kennedy and his driving skills.

Lesson Three:
Make up a crazy point and yell it out all the time. Think of parrots for your inspiration.

Example:: Howard Dean is crazy, Howard Dean is crazy, Howard Dean is crazy, Howard Dean is crazy, Howard Dean is crazy. Ted Kennedy is crazy, Ted Kennedy is crazy. <insert opponent here> is crazy. <insert opponent here> is crazy. <insert opponent here> is crazy.

Granted this is a short set of lessons, but given your post up there I am sure you are well on teh way to gettign your "Smear and Villify" medal.





You might be a Left winger if... (February 17, 2006 2:57 AM)
Posted by: Anthony Zarrella
Uhh... guys? You do *know* that these "You Might be a ________ If..." lists are just for humor, right?
You might be a Left winger if... (February 17, 2006 12:30 PM)
Posted by: Patricia Gruffs
"You don't have any interest in a country united for the common good of all, do you? You'd just LOVE to see your way of life enforced on everyone,"

Yeah, that pretty much personifies all the elite liberals I've ever seen in the media...

"Stay off topic and do not say any similar issues your side is having."

Hey Will-bore, the Topic is "You might be a Left winger if..." Why don't you stick to it?


You might be a Left winger if... (February 17, 2006 2:51 PM)
Posted by: Patricia Gruffs

You might be a leftard if...
...you believe a 13 y/o can decide to have an abortion but a "kid" enlisted in the military was too immature to make such a decision on his own.
... you believe that Roe V. Wade was supported by anything remotely constitutional.
... you say the Constitution is a "living document", but think Roe v. Wade is irreversible.
... you don't get the irony of buying a Che Guevarra t-shirt at a mall retail store.
... you believe the courts have the right to legislate from the bench, as long as there is never a Conservative majority.
...you find nothing wrong with lily-white Bill Clinton being dubbed The First Black President.
...you call Senators Sheets Byrd's stint as a high ranking KKK guy a youthful indescretion, but will demand the ouster of a minor politician who correctly uses the word "niggardly" in a sentence.
..you believe Harry Belafonte has any discernable purpose on this planet aside from singing a fairly entertaining tune a generation or two ago.
..you don't experience a shriveling sensation in your trousers when you see or hear Cindy Sheehan.
... you consider John McCain a great maverick moderate when he smacks down President Bush but a racist bomb thrower when he smacks down Kanye West..er.. Barak Obama.
...you consider any criticism of statements by, e.g., Cindy Sheehan, John Kerry, Barbara Boxer, to be an infringement of freedom of speech.
... you think making vile political statements at a funeral as completely appropriate.
...you see no problem with putting writing a letter campaign to an editor for something you classify as "insensitive" on the same level as firebombing the editors house, family, consulate, and or anything else that is readily flamible including the editor themself... so long as those doing the firebombing/letter writing are not Christian or JOOOOS.
...You denounce de-forestation, and want to save the trees, but take campaign money from carpenters unions.
...you honestly think that calls for a "lowering of the partisanships" don't actually come from your political side's hugs-and-kisses-let's-get-along department, and that they don't just mean that Rethuglicans should stop whomping your delusions with facts, but only because there's no partisanship in being a reactionary liberal.
...you end every sentence with, "BUT NO-ONE CAN QUESTION MY PATRIOTISM!"
...you think that a man without honor, dignity, and humility (say, Jimmy Carter) doesn't look like a ghoul hiding behind the coffin of a woman who exhibited those qualities.
...think Brokeback Mountain lacked substance but are afraid to say so out loud because it might be taken as an assult on someone's right not to have their personal life decisions held open for public discourse which might lead to a moment of self-doubt and other negativity.
...You feel that expressing your political views is mainstream, but anything contrary to them is a Right-Wing Conspiracy.
... you still claim they are going to 'round us liberals up into camps' even though we are one year into Bush's second term.
...you think dealing with Iraq without France or Germany but with the UK, Australia, Poland, etc. is evil "unilateralism", but dealing with Iran with France, Germany, and the UK is "outsourcing the negotiations".
... you fail to see the irony of publicly and repeatedly exclaiming 'we have no civil liberties any more'.
...you're worried that the NSA's wiretapping may lead to the divulgement of your famous "Tofu-Fiesta Casserole" recipe.
...you stopped having original ideas circa 1962.
...when outmatched in a debate your default response is "Bush Lied".
...you attempted to create a "Chocolate City" according to Ray Nagins recipe of Dark Chocolate and White Milk. Unfortunately, instead of a city, you ended up with a glass of chocolate milk.
... you exhale/expel greenhouse gases all day long yet would cry foul if someone tried to make you stop.
...you marvel at the brillance of a fellow Leftard whose complex calculitic equation proves 2+2 does not equal 4 and conveniently dimiss the fact no real solution was given as you sneer at the "stupid right" for adhering to conventional mathematical dogma.
...you are rich but have no problem taking other people's money to give to the poor.
...if you believe you are exempt from all liberal dogma you espouse.
//... you exhale/expel greenhouse gases all day long yet would cry foul if someone tried to make you stop.//
...unless of course, you're disabled and your husband had once heard you vaguely mention that you wouldn't want to be kept on life support, then someone trying to make you stop would be the BEST thing to do for the good of everyone...

These are all posted at by the intellectually talented folks at WWW.IMAO.US so AFTER you have a good giggle at Jim's cartoons or when you get bored with reading the rabid ramblings of WILL-BORE, come on over to IMAO and enjoy some good quality Conservative humor!!!

Jim, you might want to consider asking Frank J. to exchange links. I know he'd appreciate your drawings as his are mostly stick people or badly drawn animals surpassed by 2nd grade artists.
You might be a Left winger if... (February 17, 2006 2:58 PM)
Posted by: Good Will
Ah the villification cut and paste....
Please you smear some more. And forget teh actual facts and issues.

>You might be a Left winger if...
> ...You "work" for PBS.
Somewhere a puppet is crying.
You might be a Left winger if... (February 17, 2006 3:56 PM)
Posted by: Steven McAllister
Humor, eh? Those generally work because they are funny, to a certain extent true, and kind of an inside joke amongst the labelled people. I get a kick out of Foxworthy's "Redneck" jokes because I grew up in the country and understand what he's talking about. However, his jokes are presented light-heartedly and he constantly implicates himself as well as his audience. Also notice that only black comedians have managed to pull of "nigger jokes" very well. In this case, the list is jsut an example of the tendency in this country to try to pretend that those who disagree with you aren't even human; the more stereotyped traits you can pile on someone, the better, because then you don't have to think of them as a real person, with real opinions that must be addressed. We clearly have no value to you as fellow citizens whatsoever. And that's the saddest thing of all.
You might be a Left winger if... (February 17, 2006 4:00 PM)
Posted by: Patricia Gruffs
"Ah the villification cut and paste...."

It's only villification if it's not true Willie; show me ONE of those statements that is groundless.

"Somewhere a puppet is crying. "

You gotta stop handling them like that then Will, or you might get a splinter.
You might be a Left winger if... (February 17, 2006 4:04 PM)
Posted by: Patricia Gruffs
"We clearly have no value to you as fellow citizens whatsoever. "

Not true, you make a great example of left wing wackos for US mainstreamers to point and laugh at. Remember, an adventuring group doesn't work well without the rabid buffoons to keep us entertained.
You might be a Left winger if... (February 17, 2006 4:34 PM)
Posted by: Steven McAllister
How, exactly, am I a "left wing wacko?" What is it about me that removes any worth I have except as something for you (care to define mainstream as well?) to "point and laugh at?"
You might be a Left winger if... (February 17, 2006 5:38 PM)
Posted by: Patricia Gruffs
"How, exactly, am I a "left wing wacko?" "

You're constant need to batter and rail at the status quo of majority rules, and complaints that you're being villified for not coming up with any better ideas than what's going on right now. You guys want respect? Come up with a better system than welfare, show us how nationalized health care is really supposed to work (and not that idealized crap either), show me how it's okay for a woman to kill her baby in an abortion, figure out a better way to keep track of terrorists, find a better solution to the Social Security issue than private accounts, talk your elites into putting their money where their mouths are, tell me a strategic solution to removing our warriors from the middle east without leaving our backends bare, prove to us that there is no God.

These are the majority of issues the left screams shrilly about, but they never seem to have any answers for these topics except that the conservatives aren't do it right. NO, we're doing it as best we can, and shock!! The economy's doing well, unemployment is down, and the terrorist have been forced to stomp on their own grounds, making the people of their own and other countries start to realize how ridiculous they are; but the left continues to whine and complain and rather than get down about it, the best thing the majority/mainstream (you know all those people that voted FOR George Bush) can do is shrug, point and laugh. If you're not a lefty, you shouldn't feel insulted. As Weird Al said to the Amish..."Stop watching this video, isn't it agains your religion?!?!"
You might be a Left winger if... (February 17, 2006 9:53 PM)
Posted by: Steven McAllister
Anything about me personally? I'm just asking, because I wonder if you've actually read through any of my posts in an attempt to determine my views, or if you've just catagorized me as "a great example." To make it easier, here are my answers to those questions:

Majority rules: I've long maintained that majority rule, while it can legally be used to run rough shod over the minority, to do so is irresponsible, as it results in frustration and disenfrachisement of very nearly half of the country. I don't claim that Republicans aren't in charge, I just claim they could be a little more unifying with it.

Welfare: Is crap, and I think it oughta be abolished, and replaced with financial aid eligible government job training, followed by mandatory service.

Nationalized healthcare: Again, crap. A cutting edge medical system requires competition for innovation, just like any other field. My beef here is with stupidly run insurance companies, not the government.

Abortion: Way too big a kettle of fish to open here, because it is, in the end, loaded with philosophical and religious values that are impossible to argue about, because each side can invalidate the other's arguments out of hand.

Terrorists: I've merely maintained that if we sacrifice basic liberties to catch terrorists, violating our own Constitution in the process, then they have by definition won; by forcing us to act through fear.

Social Security: I'm all about privatization. One of the few good ideas W came up with, and I'm sad it got locked up in partisan wrangling.

Retreat from Iraq: No longer an option, unfortunately.

Prove there is no God: Just as impossible as proving there IS a God. It's not something you can prove or disprove, and has no place in secular political discourse.

Am I still a "left wing wacko," or would you prefer to come up with a term that describes ME, and not your amorphous perception of the other 150 million or so people in the country?

You might be a Left winger if... (February 18, 2006 11:43 AM)
Posted by: Patricia Gruffs
"Anything about me personally? "

I don't want to get to know you personally, I don't come on line to get to know people personally. I did say if you're not a left winger, stop being offended.

I will continue to point out the weakness of the left as long as they keep showing their asses.

As far as the topic, show me ONE that's unjustified, ONE that hasn't been spewed by some leftard in one forum or another (Daily Kos, Democratic Underground for example), show me ONE that's groundless...except maybe the patchouli one, that one might *just* be silly.
You might be a Left winger if... (February 18, 2006 12:49 PM)
Posted by: Patricia Gruffs
"Terrorists: I've merely maintained that if we sacrifice basic liberties to catch terrorists, violating our own Constitution in the process, then they have by definition won; by forcing us to act through fear."

And I told you, COME UP WITH A BETTER WAY TO DO IT! You've just proven your lack of substance with your statement, "Its wrong to do it that way, waaah!!"

Come up with something better, go to your freaking state, county, town representative and say "I have a better way of keeping track of terrorists than what is already being done." DO THAT!! You'll make a couple of zillion dollars and be allowed to mingle with BABS and Teddy to your heart's content. Otherwise shut'cher whining if you don't care to be made fun of.

"Abortion: Way too big a kettle of fish to open here, because it is, in the end, loaded with philosophical and religious values that are impossible to argue about, because each side can invalidate the other's arguments out of hand."

How 'bout it's just wrong.

"Am I still a "left wing wacko," or would you prefer to come up with a term that describes ME,"

You're obviously self centered enough to want this to be all about you, and from what the left has displayed, this a major character trait; David Gregory, Barbara Striesand, George Clooney, Madonna, "Reverend" Jesse Jackson, Cindy Sheehan.

Yeah, *you* might be a left winger *if*... that's the topic, fill in the blank_______

You might be a Left winger if... (February 18, 2006 4:38 PM)
Posted by: Good Will
>It's only villification if it's not true Willie; show me ONE of those statements that is groundless.

Sure:
>...facts just don't matter.
Taking miliions of people, hell billions world wide who YOU consider themself on the left of the political left and say that to all of the facts do not matter".
So basically every person who YOU think is a "leftist" is basically a liar.
You might be a Left winger if... (February 18, 2006 7:01 PM)
Posted by: Patricia Gruffs
"So basically every person who YOU think is a "leftist" is basically a liar. "

Every person that's publically proclaimed themselves to be leftists have also been proven to ignore facts, (Michael Moore, Dan Rather, Ted Kennedy are just a *few* examples) and I would guess, very easily, that those that moon over their example would do likewise. As I told Steve, if you don't consider yourself a lefty, STOP feeling insulted, but your babyish caterwauling proves just how far off the middle your twisted little mind is. You guys have just given me a new comparision

*You* might be a left-winger *if*...

...you feel ridicoulously offended over the illustration of the lameness of some extremist group's stance, though you swear to high heaven you are not a member of this group.
You might be a Left winger if... (February 18, 2006 7:07 PM)
Posted by: Patricia Gruffs
...the only word you can come up with to make an argument is "Villify"...or to make it sound REALLY important, "Villification". OOOOOOOOOOO! big fifty cent words will make you right!!!
You might be a Left winger if... (February 18, 2006 8:59 PM)
Posted by: Patricia Gruffs
I'm Trying to earn some more "cut and paste" vilification points to make Good Will happy...

You might be a leftard if...

You think that consenting adults can engage freely in every activity except capitalism.

You think the really alarming violence takes place outside the abortion clinic.

You’ve ever referred to the “root cause” of something.

You pray to “The Woman Upstairs.”

You think we never gave peace a chance.

You had to be told that “Manhattan,” “menopause” and “boycott” were not sexist words

You begin sentences with the words “I feel.”

Your driver’s license has a hyphen because for you one last name just isn’t enough.

You don’t think “All in the Family” is a very funny program, but watch it anyway because Meathead makes a lot of sense.

You think OJ is out looking for the real killers.

You think Julia Sugarbaker is an astute social commentator.

You think it takes a village.

You think that the words “to promote the general welfare” in the Constitution mean to promote welfare generally.

You think that, even though more people voted against him than for him in both the 1992 and the 1996 presidential elections, Bill Clinton had a mandate.

You think that conservatives, like preservatives, ought to be federally regulated.

You have ever wondered out loud, “Why can’t we all just get along?”

You think the New York Times prints all the news that’s fit.

You think that Rush Limbaugh is just an entertainer.

You spent Columbus Day reading Bury My Heart at Wounded Knee.

You reach the limits of your talent and then complain that you ran into a glass ceiling.

You wear more ribbons on your lapel than in your hair.

You think that the really dangerous McCarthy was Joe, not Eugene.

You blame the Unabomber’s parents.

You fail to see the connection between Lenin and Lennon.

You have ever agreed with Martin Sheen or Barbra Streisand

I got these zingers at the aptly named, www.laughatliberals.com , not trying to take much attention away from Mr. Huber's site, but showing that, as conservatives, we must all try to unify, just to prove to the left how tiny *their* piece of the American pie really is, so they'll quit referring to themselves as "mainstream" America. While they whine and whine about how divided the country is, the truth remains that they're the ones who are acting like a wedge in a tree, trying to make us all fall down. A strong healthy tree will grow the wedge out of it. It'll be scarred, but stronger in that particular spot.

Heehee, yeah I know I just set myself up for a lumberjack joke, but you know if the lefty's really care about the environment, they'll let that tree grow the way it's supposed to.



You might be a Left winger if... (February 19, 2006 5:28 PM)
Posted by: Crazy Pete
Patricia, Its not their liberals, there is a big debate as to if Liberalism as a way of life or a choice. I personaly don't believe its a choice, I think a person makes themself a liberal. They just have to say the Liberal prayers... it goes...

I am a liberal, but I can change, if I have to... I guess.

(Good Will, you know, Conservatives watch PBS too, we try to find something intelligent, and it can be a chore, but we do watch it. Ever seen RedGreen?)

Oh and Patricia, everybody Villifies, it's okay, (Except for Good Will) It seems to be his favorite word.
You might be a Left winger if... (February 19, 2006 6:23 PM)
Posted by: Good Will
>Oh and Patricia, everybody Villifies, it's okay,
Oh it is? So lets not even try to just stick to politeness and issues.

>(Except for Good Will) It seems to be his favorite word.
It has a "V" in it. Prettyyyy.

You take a guy,
You vilify
96 unvilified guys on the wall
You might be a Left winger if... (February 19, 2006 6:38 PM)
Posted by: Patricia Gruffs
You might be a left winger if you can't come up with a better way to promote your favorite pretty word than a boring beer can road song. But then beer can songs were Ted Kennedy's favorites so I guess it works for you Will-bore. It would explain why you can't type coherently half the time.

You might be a left winger if...

...you get good and drunk before going on line and typing your rant about how unfair you think life is on a forum where people point and laugh at you.
You might be a Left winger if... (February 19, 2006 9:49 PM)
Posted by: Anthony Zarrella
Urrgh... OK, 1) even if some of these lines are inaccurate (and some *are* Patricia... I've voted Republican my whole life and I still say that), some of them are still funny, and that's part of the point. 2) Patricia, keep up the funny lists, but *please* stop with the ad hominem drivel. To be honest, you're embarrassing me by making people who read your personal attacks as representative of conservatives in general. And Good Will... *stop taking the bait*!

I want to make it clear that *not* all conservatives make use of insults in their arguments, and that those who do should not be taken as representative of the rest of us.

The only other thing I have to say is, Steven, you make a lot of sense with those opinions, and I even agree on most of them (*especially* your views on welfare, healthcare, and Social Security).
You might be a Left winger if... (February 22, 2006 12:35 PM)
Posted by: Good Will
>And Good Will... *stop taking the bait*!
Seriously, I do not care that much that it actually affects me.
It mainly amuses me. Do not orry about it and just skip to parts where I address the issue you and I talk about.
You might be a Left winger if... (February 22, 2006 1:00 PM)
Posted by: Anthony Zarrella
Gotcha... will do.

Post a reply

Subject:

Message:

Username: Password:
Forgot your username/password?
If you haven't already, register now.